I reread some of your old blogs,
with new eyes, the words have new meaning,
I mourn your loss, at the same time as I dream our future.
I want to hate her, and I want to know her, understand her....
Part of me is scared, because it is like looking at me in the mirror so many years ago,
when I was that lost, scared, angry and alone.
There is a part of me I am questioning,
Why are my feelings so intense? Why do I NEED to do this?
not knowing what it is I am doing.
Am I wrong to treat others as I want to be treated?
Why does it surprise me that others don't understand my reasons for doing that?
Why is this need so powerful? Is part of me is healing, or will it hurt me in the end...
all I know is that I have never felt so strongly about what I AM doing.
I guess that is the reason I am doing it.
Sometimes I wish we had met years ago. when we were both at our lowest, so that we could have helped each other up. But in my deepest Being, I know that we each had to mourn our losses alone, and cleanse our hearts to make room for each other.
ReplyDeleteWe both still have a ways to go, and every day I thank the Universe that we met at just the right time to travel the rest of our journey together.
I love you Emerald, my gem.
Had you both met earlier you may not have even recognized each other and crossed paths. Each of you had to undergo your unique experiences, however painful, to be here today where you are. I wish the best for both of you.
ReplyDeleteStill, your paths crossed.
ReplyDeleteAt the time it was meant to be. And it did.
I wish you both a love that will last all of your lifetimes.
Gem, sometimes we do things because our souls long for it and we just must.